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Thursday, July 10, 2008
An Atheist Professor of philosophy speaks to his class on the problem science has with God, The Almighty.
He asks one of his new students to stand and.....
Prof: So you believe in God?
Student: Absolutely, sir.
Prof: Is God good?
Student: Sure.
Prof: Is God all-powerful?
Student: Yes.
Prof: My brother died of cancer even though he prayed to God to heal him. Most of us would attempt to help others who are ill.But God didn't. How is this God good then? Hmm?
(Student is silent.)
Prof: You can't answer, can you? Let's start again, young fella.Is God good?
Student: Yes.
Prof: Is Satan good?
Student: No.
Prof: Where does Satan come from?
Student: From...God...
Prof: That's right. Tell me son, is there evil in this world?
Student: Yes.
Prof: Evil is everywhere, isn't it? And God did make everything.Correct?
Student: Yes.
Prof: So who created evil?
(Student does not answer.)
Prof: Is there sickness? Immorality? Hatred? Ugliness? All these terrible things exist in the world, don't they?
Student: Yes, sir.
Prof: So, who created them?
(Student has no answer.)
Prof: Science says you have 5 senses you use to identify and observe the world around you. Tell me, son...Have you ever seen God?
Student: No, sir.
Prof: Tell us if you have ever heard your God?
Student: No, sir.
Prof: Have you ever felt your God, tasted your God, or smelled your God? Have you ever had any sensory perception of God for that matter?
Student: No, sir. I'm afraid I haven't.
Prof: Yet you still believe in Him?
Student: Yes.
Prof: According to empirical, testable, demonstrable protocol,science says your GOD doesn't exist. What do you say to that, son?
Student: Nothing. I only have my faith.
Prof: Yes. Faith. And that is the problem science has.
Student: Professor, is there such a thing as heat?
Prof: Yes.
Student: And is there such a thing as cold?
Prof: Yes.
Student: No sir. There isn't.
(The lecture theatre becomes very quiet with this turn of events.)
Student: Sir, you can have lots of heat, even more heat, superheat, mega heat, white heat, a little heat or no heat. But we don't have anything called cold. We can hit 458 degrees below zero which is no heat, but we can't go any further after that.There is no such thing as cold.Cold is only a word we use to describe the absence of heat. We cannot measure cold. Heat is energy. Cold is not the opposite of heat, sir, just the absence of it.
(There is pin-drop silence in the lecture theatre.)
Student: What about darkness, Professor? Is there such a thing as darkness?
Prof: Yes. What is night if there isn't darkness?
Student: You're wrong again, sir. Darkness is the absence of something. You can have low light, normal light, bright light,
flashing light....But if you have no light constantly, you have nothing and it's called darkness, isn't it? In reality, darkness isn't.If it were, you would be able to make darkness darker,wouldn't you?
Prof: So what is the point you a! re making, young man?
Student: Sir, my point is your philosophical premise is flawed.
Prof: Flawed? Can you explain how?
Student: Sir, you are working on the premise of duality. You argue there is life and then there is death, a good God and a bad God.You are viewing the concept of God as something finite,something we can measure. Sir, science can't even explain a
thought.It uses electricity and magnetism, but has never seen,much less fully understood either one.To view death as the opposite of life is to be ignorant of the fact that death cannot exist as a substantive thing.Death is not the opposite of life: just the absence of it. Now tell me, Professor. Do you teach your students that they evolved from a monkey?
Prof: If you are referring to the natural evolutionary process,yes, of course, I do.
Student: Have you ever observed evolution with your own eyes,sir?
(The Professor shakes his head with a smile, beginning to realize where the argument is going.)
Student: Since no one has ever observed the process of evolution at work and cannot even prove that this process is an on-going endeavour,are you not teaching your opinion, sir? Are you not a preacher rather than a scientist?
(The class is in uproar)
Student: Is there anyone in the class who has ever seen the Professor's brain?
(The class ! breaks out into laughter.)
Student: Is there anyone here who has ever heard the Professor's brain,felt it, touched or smelled it?
No one appears to have done. So, according to the established rules of empirical, stable, demonstrable protocol,science says that you have no brain, sir. With all due respect, sir, how do we then trust your lectures, sir?
(The room is silent. The professor stares at the student, his face unfathomable.)
Prof: I guess you'll have to take them on faith, son.
Student : That is it, sir.. The link between man & God is FAITH.That is all that keeps things moving & alive.
Now guess who the student is ?????
That young man was Dinesh Reddy...... Ha Ha....not me...he was Vivekananda
He asks one of his new students to stand and.....
Prof: So you believe in God?
Student: Absolutely, sir.
Prof: Is God good?
Student: Sure.
Prof: Is God all-powerful?
Student: Yes.
Prof: My brother died of cancer even though he prayed to God to heal him. Most of us would attempt to help others who are ill.But God didn't. How is this God good then? Hmm?
(Student is silent.)
Prof: You can't answer, can you? Let's start again, young fella.Is God good?
Student: Yes.
Prof: Is Satan good?
Student: No.
Prof: Where does Satan come from?
Student: From...God...
Prof: That's right. Tell me son, is there evil in this world?
Student: Yes.
Prof: Evil is everywhere, isn't it? And God did make everything.Correct?
Student: Yes.
Prof: So who created evil?
(Student does not answer.)
Prof: Is there sickness? Immorality? Hatred? Ugliness? All these terrible things exist in the world, don't they?
Student: Yes, sir.
Prof: So, who created them?
(Student has no answer.)
Prof: Science says you have 5 senses you use to identify and observe the world around you. Tell me, son...Have you ever seen God?
Student: No, sir.
Prof: Tell us if you have ever heard your God?
Student: No, sir.
Prof: Have you ever felt your God, tasted your God, or smelled your God? Have you ever had any sensory perception of God for that matter?
Student: No, sir. I'm afraid I haven't.
Prof: Yet you still believe in Him?
Student: Yes.
Prof: According to empirical, testable, demonstrable protocol,science says your GOD doesn't exist. What do you say to that, son?
Student: Nothing. I only have my faith.
Prof: Yes. Faith. And that is the problem science has.
Student: Professor, is there such a thing as heat?
Prof: Yes.
Student: And is there such a thing as cold?
Prof: Yes.
Student: No sir. There isn't.
(The lecture theatre becomes very quiet with this turn of events.)
Student: Sir, you can have lots of heat, even more heat, superheat, mega heat, white heat, a little heat or no heat. But we don't have anything called cold. We can hit 458 degrees below zero which is no heat, but we can't go any further after that.There is no such thing as cold.Cold is only a word we use to describe the absence of heat. We cannot measure cold. Heat is energy. Cold is not the opposite of heat, sir, just the absence of it.
(There is pin-drop silence in the lecture theatre.)
Student: What about darkness, Professor? Is there such a thing as darkness?
Prof: Yes. What is night if there isn't darkness?
Student: You're wrong again, sir. Darkness is the absence of something. You can have low light, normal light, bright light,
flashing light....But if you have no light constantly, you have nothing and it's called darkness, isn't it? In reality, darkness isn't.If it were, you would be able to make darkness darker,wouldn't you?
Prof: So what is the point you a! re making, young man?
Student: Sir, my point is your philosophical premise is flawed.
Prof: Flawed? Can you explain how?
Student: Sir, you are working on the premise of duality. You argue there is life and then there is death, a good God and a bad God.You are viewing the concept of God as something finite,something we can measure. Sir, science can't even explain a
thought.It uses electricity and magnetism, but has never seen,much less fully understood either one.To view death as the opposite of life is to be ignorant of the fact that death cannot exist as a substantive thing.Death is not the opposite of life: just the absence of it. Now tell me, Professor. Do you teach your students that they evolved from a monkey?
Prof: If you are referring to the natural evolutionary process,yes, of course, I do.
Student: Have you ever observed evolution with your own eyes,sir?
(The Professor shakes his head with a smile, beginning to realize where the argument is going.)
Student: Since no one has ever observed the process of evolution at work and cannot even prove that this process is an on-going endeavour,are you not teaching your opinion, sir? Are you not a preacher rather than a scientist?
(The class is in uproar)
Student: Is there anyone in the class who has ever seen the Professor's brain?
(The class ! breaks out into laughter.)
Student: Is there anyone here who has ever heard the Professor's brain,felt it, touched or smelled it?
No one appears to have done. So, according to the established rules of empirical, stable, demonstrable protocol,science says that you have no brain, sir. With all due respect, sir, how do we then trust your lectures, sir?
(The room is silent. The professor stares at the student, his face unfathomable.)
Prof: I guess you'll have to take them on faith, son.
Student : That is it, sir.. The link between man & God is FAITH.That is all that keeps things moving & alive.
Now guess who the student is ?????
That young man was Dinesh Reddy...... Ha Ha....not me...he was Vivekananda
Your Personality
There is a very, very tall coconut tree, and there are 4 animals: King Kong, Ape, Orangutan and a Monkey pass by. They have a competition to see who is the fastest to get the banana.
Who do you guess will win?
Your answer will reflect your personality. Try and answer within 30 seconds
Got your answer? Scroll down to see the analysis.
If your answer is ....
Orangutan = dull/stupid
Ape = foolish
Monkey = idiot
King Kong = stupid
Your answer will reflect your personality. Try and answer within 30 seconds
Got your answer? Scroll down to see the analysis.
Orangutan = dull/stupid
Ape = foolish
Monkey = idiot
King Kong = stupid
Why?????
Coconut tree never has bananas..... ...!!
What is love and marriage
A student asks a teacher, “What is love?”
The teacher said, “in order to answer your question, go to the wheat field and choose the biggest wheat and come back.
But the rule is: - you can go through them only once & cannot turn back to pick.”
The student went to the field, go thru first row, he saw one big wheat, but he wonders….may be there is a bigger one later.
Then he saw another bigger one… but may be there is an even bigger one waiting for him.
Later, when he finished more than half of the wheat field, he starts to realise that the wheat is not as big as the previous one he saw, he knew he has missed the biggest one, and he regretted.
So, he ended up went back to the teacher with empty hand. The teacher told him, “…this is love… you keep looking for better ones, but when later you realise, you have already missed the person….”
“What is marriage then?” the student asked.
The teacher said, “in order to answer your question, go to the corn field and choose the biggest corn and come back.
But the rule is: you can go through them only once and cannot turn back to pick.”
The student went to the corn field, this time he is careful not to repeat the previous mistake, when he reach the middle of the field, he has picked one medium sized corn that he felt satisfied, and came back to t he teacher.
The teacher told him, “this time you bring back a corn…. you look for one that is just nice, and you have faith and believe this is the best one you get…. this is marriage.”*
The teacher said, “in order to answer your question, go to the wheat field and choose the biggest wheat and come back.
But the rule is: - you can go through them only once & cannot turn back to pick.”
The student went to the field, go thru first row, he saw one big wheat, but he wonders….may be there is a bigger one later.
Then he saw another bigger one… but may be there is an even bigger one waiting for him.
Later, when he finished more than half of the wheat field, he starts to realise that the wheat is not as big as the previous one he saw, he knew he has missed the biggest one, and he regretted.
So, he ended up went back to the teacher with empty hand. The teacher told him, “…this is love… you keep looking for better ones, but when later you realise, you have already missed the person….”
“What is marriage then?” the student asked.
The teacher said, “in order to answer your question, go to the corn field and choose the biggest corn and come back.
But the rule is: you can go through them only once and cannot turn back to pick.”
The student went to the corn field, this time he is careful not to repeat the previous mistake, when he reach the middle of the field, he has picked one medium sized corn that he felt satisfied, and came back to t he teacher.
The teacher told him, “this time you bring back a corn…. you look for one that is just nice, and you have faith and believe this is the best one you get…. this is marriage.”*
I would like to buy some cyanide !
A nice, calm and respectable lady went into the pharmacy, walked up to the pharmacist, looked straight into his eyes, and said, "I would like to buy some cyanide."
The pharmacist asked, "Why in the world do you need cyanide?"
The lady replied, "I need it to poison my husband."
The pharmacist's eye got big and he exclaimed, "Lord have mercy! I can't give you cyanide to kill your husband. That's against the law! I'll lose my license!
They'll throw both of us in jail! All kinds of bad things will happen. Absolutely not! You CANNOT have any cyanide!"
The lady reached into her purse and pulled out a picture of her husband in bed with the pharmacist's wife.
The pharmacist looked at the picture and replied,
"Well now, that's different.
You didn't tell me you had a prescription."
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